My world has been blown WIDE open by the discovery of Tea.

I’ve managed to give away Coffee/Coke for 2 weeks and just hit Green Tea aaaaaaand I’m loving it! I went to Tea 2 and bought Tea paraphernalia. I even went back a second time and bought a $1.20 piece of orange plastic that will supposedly scoop out the optimal amount of loose leaf tea for brewin’ my perfect cuppa. Then I went to the Oriental Tea House and had an awkward “conversation” in which it took 4 tries to explain that I wanted to buy some Green Tea to take home with me (incidentally, I don’t know how asking for Green Tea led her to point at the dim sum, but whatever.)

Managing to completely obliterate any savings I may have accumulated by not buying Coke or coffee anymore, I spent an additional $15 on a Travel Tea Cup that must have cost about 20c to make. Being a busy man with not much time afforded him, I need my new love of loose leaf tea to be just like my copy of FireFox – Portable.

If this continues (as I hope it will) I may even become offended at references to teabagging, as my new love – Tea – should not be associated with such acts of vulgarity.

Looking back on my life, I finally understand what all those old fogies were on about with that whole “oooh I could go a nice cuppa tea” crap. Being of English heritage, I figured it must be in the blood.. but considering I’m yet to try English Breakfast, I have to wonder… My love of Eastern Culture (read: it’s smokin’ hot ladies) has translated to Tea, in that I’ve only really been drinking Green Tea. Worst of all, I think my favourite is probably the most effeminate Tea possible.. Strawberry Green Tea. But I guess, It would be worse to love a masculine Tea.. that’d surely be more gay than loving a girly one right? Because I don’t love dudes, no matter what the gay guys from across the road claimed I said that night I got turbo hammered on Asahi, Absinthe & Sambuca and passed out at the bottom of the stairwell whilst trying to crawl upstairs to bed.

Good times.