The ‘Rants’ Archive

I work in IT. Computers. Its a booming industry and it pays well. Whenever I’m at a par-tay I’m loathe to tell people what I do because people are generally so small minded they cant handle dealing with someone who works on computers but isn’t a total fucking nerd whos into Star Wars and Star [...]

I realized something the other day.. now that I have a blog, my opinion suddenly counts. So how better to flaunt my new-found fame than by sending a letter to O-Unit? Sup O-Dizzle? Grats on the new job man, fuck.. well done. Talk about overcoming the odds.. this is bigger than that time I managed [...]

It all started with a 2.5 hour round trip to Werribee to pick up my desk thanks to chapperone Claire. Having just moved to Clifto, I was getting depressed at using my computer on the floor, so much so I was whinging about it on Twitter. On our way back from Wezza I picked up [...]

The other day I was shooting the shit with my housemate and her boyfriend.. we ended up talking about how boring the ending of Schindler’s List is and we came up with an alternative ending. Then Claire got involved. Then my housemates cats made some glaring edits as you can tell from the pictures, but [...]

So I get an hour for lunch & hop a tram out to Smith St TSL factory outlet because I want a black Bonds hoodie, but they don’t have any in my size. A tram rolls up to head down to that Brands United store (that had someone paint an M after their logo so [...]

What happened to my youth? I remember when I was 18, working my first job as a Customer Service Analyst/Phone Monkey and I got into my 24 year old mate Scott’s car (surprising in hindsight considering I used to think he was a date rapist.) I gave him shit for being old because he had [...]

When was the last time one of your friends surprised you with a tasty bit of cross-stitch? I’m waiting.. EXACTLY. How gorgeous?? Claire is the cross-stitch mastah!!! Plus I forwarded her an e-mail from this chick I was talking to who was on some perpetual rag that resulted in giving me tonnes of personal shit [...]

People need to stop stealing my ideas before I have them. Its bullshit. Example 1: UpBurqa.com My love of upskirt porn combined with my love of high-brow comedy. Sure this has probably allowed me to dodge mailbombs from Islamic extremists, but seriously, this would have been solid gold. None of that lame ass Sovereign Hill [...]